Once upon a time, Factory Records was home to Joy Division, New Order and the Happy Mondays. But those halcyon Madchester days are long gone. Instead, the independent label’s offices have been replaced by a nightclub that smells of stale sweat and staler spilt beer. Its star guests used to be Ian Curtis and Bez. Tonight, I’m here to watch a man called The Crypto Raptor. His greatest hits: “The Crypto Rap”, “CryptoJuice”, and “Here Comes the World Health Org”.
The Crypto Raptor is performing at the afterparty for Bitfest 25, the UK’s most evangelical Bitcoin festival. Founded by Bitcoin enthusiasts sick of the pump-and-dump, get-rich-quick attitudes of other festivals, Bitfest is more about the lifestyle than the cash. Forget tech bros hawking their own cryptocurrency. At £200 a ticket, this is one for the purists — the people who regard Bitcoin, the world’s first cryptocurrency, as more than just an innovative way to bank. For them, it’s a cure for all of society’s ills, from inflation and immigration to welfare and war.
The three-day festival is held in a mid-budget Manchester hotel. The crowd skews middle-aged and male. Some have the look of Scandinavian architects; others resemble retired battle rappers. A few wouldn’t be out of place at Comic-Con. There is also a gaggle of children, taking part in a Bitcoin-themed scavenger hunt. One nine-year-old girl sits on the side, scrolling through Nostr, a decentralised “censorship-resistant” alternative to X.
For the adults, there are talks on subjects ranging from “how Bitcoin can improve the mind and body” to the anthropology of cryptocurrency. There’s also a cinema screening “freedom-related” documentaries, along with an art gallery displaying everything from Ian Curtis portraits to early Rare Pepes, the meme series that began as a niche crypto in-joke before being co-opted by the online far-right. One of the Rare Pepe artists tells me he misses the old days. Before Dogecoin was invented and the crazy money piled in. When Bitcoin was still cool.
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